CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
