Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
