I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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