I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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