Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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