whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Randomize
