dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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