I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
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He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
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I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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