i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
