your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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