i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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