Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
