She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
