farters have to be the big spoon...
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
high people should be assigned attendants
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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