If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
