Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize