That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize