I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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