This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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