I cockslap morals
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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