Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize