Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
