so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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