You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize