sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize