So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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