This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
