Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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