Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
