you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize