I'm jealous of your bromance
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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