im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
