I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
