As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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