Im at strip club and am horny
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Randomize
