I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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