were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize