He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
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