I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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