what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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