if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
