Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Randomize
