Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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