On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
