I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
