Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
