Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
