I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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