Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
