We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
