Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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