why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
